Browsing "My Story"
Nov 24, 2012 - My Story    No Comments

Liquid Patience

There was a lot of texting going on yesterday. Friends saying, “Happy Thanksgiving!” or chatting about the fantastic deals they snagged on Black Friday. One friend’s comment caught my attention. He posted, “I’m drinking my liquid patience at Starbucks– getting ready for the mall.”

Liquid patience.

If only!

I needed liquid patience today. I didn’t sleep well, had rough patients, needed to have a potentially tough conversation with some friends. I felt off, un-resilient to life. My eyelids were heavy and my fuse was short.

I needed liquid patience.

But instead, I prayed. I prayed for grace for the moment. I prayed that as I drove home that I would have grace with the other drivers. I prayed that I would enter the house happily instead of crabby for my roommates’ sakes. I prayed that I would be given words of grace, seasoned with salt, instead of caustic, biting words. I prayed for liquid patience.

I think it worked.

And it’s cheaper than Starbucks and always available!

Nov 23, 2012 - My Story    No Comments

Thanksgiving and Black Friday

My brother is profound.

Especially for his age – he’s only fifteen, but can come out with some doozies.

This year, for the first time ever, I went Black Friday shopping. While I am not a fan of crowds, once inside I could sense the excitement and knew why people did this. It was like a drug. According to my receipts I saved over $200 today and spent just a small portion of that! My family frantically rushed from store to store to get the best Black Friday deals we could find. I snagged some seasons of hit TV shows for $8 a piece. Towels for just quarters and quality coffee for a few bucks too. My brother and I headed to Target at opening and waited in a line a few hundred people long to pay. We drove to three different stores to find the absolute best price on a Wii video game he wanted. As we were driving home, feet exhausted, packages piled high, he said, “Isn’t it funny that after we give thanks for everything we have on Thanksgiving, that we focus so much on getting more the very next day?”

Ouch.

So we take one day a year to give thanks, and our gratitude lasts only that long.

What would it be like to live in gratefulness? I think I’d like to find out.

Nov 22, 2012 - My Story    No Comments

My Green Dream

Last night I dreamed that I bought deodorant made out of used crayons.

It was the rainbow packaging that got my attention.

I remember walking through the grocery store aimlessly and finding myself on the health aisle. Then I noticed it. The rainbow packaging. So glittery, so sparkly. I wondered what this diamond in the rough could be.

It was crayons repurposed as deodorant.

I stopped my meandering and studied this new find. It contained every color of the rainbow swirled and glitteriezed. It sat quietly on the shelf, sanguine and self-confident next to the Degree. I picked it up, uncapped it, and breathed in slowly. I smelled that waxy new crayon box smell. I was instantly reminded of arranging my 64 count Crayolas into rainbow order. And explaining, in detail, the significant differences between green-blue and blue-green to my parents.

Now that I am awake, I wonder what this could mean. Other than the applaudable fact that my subconscious is apparently extremely environmentally conscious, what does this say about me?

Am I longing for a connection to my childhood? Am I longing for creativity and newness? Am I just really attracted to glittery things?

I’m not sure. But it was a fun dream that I’m thankful to remember and will continue to ponder.

What do you think?

Nov 21, 2012 - Devotional, My Story    No Comments

Welcome to my Crazy

I’ve decided that I’m crazy.
Maybe I stepped over the line whilst doing a jig in my kitchen waiting for the microwave to ding. Or maybe it was when I burst into laughter in the middle of a quiet room because I remembered something hilarious from the day before. Or maybe it was the practical joke that I planned for months and managed to keep secret. (See photo for evidence!)

 

But sometimes, my crazy isn’t fun or lighthearted. Like the time I tried to have a conversation, but it   consisted of mostly harrumphs and sighs because I was too frustrated and distracted to actually find words. My crazy is sometimes insidious. It’s the internal voice that harangues me whispering half-truths that I can be more.

So I’m declaring it. I’m crazy.

Maybe you can relate.

One of my professors in seminary said, “If stress doesn’t get out frontwards, it gets out sideways.” I know this first hand. Sometimes I feel resilient to disappointments in life. I can handle traffic or missed appointments or hard conversations. But sometimes I react more strongly than is warranted for the situation. That’s when I feel the most crazy.

But I’ve also come up with a treatment plan.

Writing.

That’s how I let my crazy get out. In controlled little bursts so as not to overwhelm anyone!

I process life best by writing and thinking through what happened, how I reacted, what could be different. Hence this blog. Because the title is true, I really do think on paper! This blog will contain stories, anecdotes, and general life processing. It will be real thoughts on virtual paper!

Thanks for being a part of my crazy.

%d bloggers like this: