Tuck me in. Put me to bed.
It was a long week. We were extra busy in the NICU and lower staffed due to holidays both of which added up to longer hours for yours truly. I did great, right up until two o’clock today. That’s when I hit the magical divide between regular time and overtime, and my brain revolted. My body tensed up. My energy evaporated.
Is this what full time feels like? How do people do it? Especially people come home to children and caregiving or homework or a second job. Goodness, I’m thankful I only have to feed myself tonight!
I want to have balance in life. My work should not rule all my decisions. But I spend more time at work than at any other entity, so it should guide many of my decisions — like going to bed on time or turning down a Monday night outing so as not to star the week tired. I also don’t want to straggle into the weekend, spent and panting. I want to have energy and motivation to spend time with others and make the most of my weekends instead of thinking of them as solely recuperation days. I’m still trying to figure out this tenuous balancing act.
So far my jaunt into adulthood has left me feeling blessed to have such an amazing job where I get to treat children and make a difference… but also in need of my own nap time!