This paragraph slayed me.
It spoke to my heart. It was exactly what I needed to hear. It’s an excerpt from a book called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, a collection of devotions for each day of the year written as through God were talking to you (hence the high number of capital letters!)
Read carefully, it might change your life:
I am leading you, step by step, through your life. Hold My hand in trusting dependence, letting Me guide you through this day. Your future looks uncertain and feels flimsy — even precarious. That is how it should be. Secret things belong to the Lord, and future things are secret things. When you try to figure out the future, you are grasping at things that are Mine. This, like all forms of worry, is an act of rebellion: doubting My promises to care for you.
Whenever you find yourself worrying about the future, repent and return to Me. I will show you the next step forward, and the one after that, and the one after that. Relax and enjoy the journey in My Presence, trusting Me to open up the way before you as you go. (p. 59)
That is how it should be? That is how it should be!
That’s not how I live.
I wish I had faith for all situations — the mountaintops of overflowing gratitude and joy, the depths of loneliness, and perhaps most of all, the times of agonizing waiting. My life does feel flimsy and precarious at times. I’m learning slowly — no very slowly — that flimsiness and uncertainty is an opportunity. I want to choose trust instead of doubt. To truly believe that I have enough grace for today, whatever it may hold. To trust that I have enough light for the step I’m on. That I cannot plan or store up grace for tomorrows steps today.
That is how it should be.