I Think On Paper

Life is busy.

That may be the biggest understatement of the year for you, just as it is for me.

My friend recently told that I was effectively leading three lives, which she labeled as: full-time student, full-time therapist, and everything else (church, friends, sleep, downtime).

I have tried very purposefully to balance and keep the three lives moving in unison. But without constant vigilance, the first two lives balloon out and eclipse the third. I will not allow my school projects to usurp self-care time. I will work fervently when I am at work, and I will rest fiercely when I am away.

I’ve started adding time that I call Doctoral Student Playtime. I need it. My days are directed by infants’ schedules and productivity demands. My evenings are swallowed in research articles and APA citations. There has to be a third space to keep me sane.

I’ve fit lots of options into this third space: Disney, dinner with a friend, sitting outside and watching the birds at my bird feeder (Yes, I am an old lady). I’ve added another category: Play. Do the unexpected. Be ridiculous. Laugh at yourself.

I read a book recently, aptly called Play, which argued for the importance of play in childhood. As a therapist, I know this. Play is a child’s primary occupation. It is the principle method utilized to learn about oneself and the world. But the book argued that playtime was also crucial for adults. We need a balance in life. We will quickly run out of steam if work, productivity, achievement, accomplishment, and efficiency is our driving force.

Levity matters. Playfulness strengthens. Laughter heals.

It doesn’t take long. The more ridiculous, the better in my opinion. Five minutes of laughter can fill my tank after five hours of paper writing. So I’m committed to making time to play. I invite you to join me!

I have my own elf on the shelf tradition. Set up the most ridiculous scenarios ever to entertain your roommates. I got to introduce my new roomies to this small joy of Christmas… and they totally took to it!

Cheeky, the apt name of my elf on a shelf, continues his yearly antics this year, succeeded in making us laugh, and in retaining a bit of the childhood playfulness that I hope I never lose. I enjoy the balance of playfulness, seriousness, studiousness, and laughter that permeates my life and I am thankful that other people in my world can help me with this balance.

I declared this Christmas the Guilt-Free Christmas! Between work projects and school and other duties in life, I didn’t have time to bake or shop or craft or do many of the things I typically enjoy. Yes, all my presents were purchased online. No, I did not contribute to the cookie exchange. Yes, I ate Christmas cookies without tracking them. No, I didn’t feel guilty! I enjoyed it all. Christmas is busy and stressful and I will continue to use Cheeky as a small stress relief to my household to bring merriment and joy! May he make you smile today.

I had no idea this was a trend! Sometimes I feel wide-eyed like this in life. Glad to know I have some traveling companions in the tunnel of life. Take heart, there is light at the end of every tunnel.

I hope it makes you smile as well!

2014 was the year of the Disney Selfie.

I have a photo album of over 700 photos of my face awkwardly riding attractions, and greeting characters, and seeing fireworks, and seeing all things Disney! Even Cheeky got into the spirit…

I was challenged by some friends to ride every attraction, see every show, meet every character, and basically hit every high point at all four Walt Disney World parks in 2014. To prove my efforts I had to take selfies for confirmation, get autographs, and log my work on extensive spreadsheets.

I learned a few things competing in this Disney Ultimate Challenge. Firstly, I learned that I had to care a little less what others thought of me. Cast members would laugh or roll their eyes at me as I pulled out multiple stapled packets of paper to log my accomplishments. I got some strange looks as I waited in line to meet Duffy the Bear with a gaggle of four year olds. I did portions of this competition solo and got some plaintive looks as I was asked, “How many in your party.” “Just one!” I’d reply cheerfully as I whipped out my spreadsheets!

I also learned that competitions are fun, but so it going without a plan. And there were a few specific trips to Disney which were solely to get points and not to have fun! Many friends who accompanied me on these trips and were great sports to stand and watch me dance in the “Frontierland Hoedown” instead of leaving me to ride Splash Mountain! Planning an spontaneity are both good. Having a balance is important.

At the end of the year, I have 176 points, (solidly in second place!) and a collection of the most ridiculous pictures ever. Here are a few of my absolute favorites.

When  have you competed in something fun? What did YOU learn?

Well, folks, this bit of temporary coding magic might just be the only snow I get to see this year. I hope you enjoy it as well. Merry Christmas!

I cannot go through the joy of this season without giggling uncontrollably at this video. May it give you a brief pause in the midst of the hurry. Watch this and realize that no matter how far behind you feel or what you have on your to do list, you’re having a better day than this guy!

Happy Christmas!

And one more for good measure!

Today is National Cartwheel Day.

Because I declared it so.

Here’s the story:

When I was a young tyke, I took gymnastics. That was until I was so tall that I could hang from the upper uneven parallel bars and my toes touched the ground. I was 10.

It was a sad day when I had to change my athletic aspirations because no nearly six feet tall woman can contort herself enough to be an Olympic gymnast. Sorry Bela Karolyi, I won’t be joining you this summer.

Fast forward fifteen years, to envision me sitting with some friends celebrating July the 4th. For some reason our conservation made me think, “I wonder if I could still do a cartwheel.” So I tried. And it felt good. Like holding onto just a smidgen of my gymnastic Olympic hopefulness. I decided that day that I would attempt a cartwheel every year to prove to myself that I could still do it. Hence, July 4th is National Cartwheel Day.

It’s a way to be nostalgic and also prove to myself what I’m capable of. If you flip quickly you’ll get an idea of how it looks in person.

I realize that one day my celebration of National Cartwheel Day may go horribly wrong. But until then I participate in my topsy turvy tumbling tradition with glee celebrating the joys and challenges of childhood.

Happy National Cartwheel Day!

“I’ve decided that adulthood is overrated. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in my blanket fort eating Bugles from my fingertips and watching a movie.”

This was a meme that was passed around through cyberspace not so long ago. But we made it come true!

Last weekend, one of my roommates felt the need to be swaddled. She’d had an overwhelming day and needing to block out some sensory input.  I walked out into the living room to this sight.

I immediately “knocked” and asked to join her!

I then went to grab another roommate, who has having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. I knew just the prescription: BLANKET FORT!

In order to accommodate the growing population of New Fluffy Town (as I dubbed our fort) we architected a larger scale rendition.

We then completed the childhood recapitulation by eating cookies, drinking Capri Sun and eating Bugles from our fingertips… and watching Peter Pan — on VHS. For a few hours on Sunday night, we were in a time warp. We forgot about work and school the next day, piled into our makeshift shelter, and enjoyed the moment.

New Fluffy Town was magic. Not because we didn’t return to adulthood later, but because it gave us something different. Something to be excited about: we created a memory. We did something that won’t soon be forgotten. It was fun and silly and perfect. It was our celebration of childhood and togetherness.

Sometimes I forget how blessed my life is. I can easily focus on what I don’t have and want rather than celebrate what I do have in droves! I have community, friends, time, and friendship. New Fluffy Town reminded me how awesome life is.

What could you do to create a memory and celebrate what blessings you have in life?

I fought with my curtains last week.

I lost.

These curtains have been hanging in my bathroom for years. I’m not even sure how long because they were there when I moved in and haven’t done anything to them. But they were looking a little dirty, dusty, and in need of a thorough once-a-decade-washing.

So I wrestled with the curtain rod, which had begun to grow permanently into the drywall and finally exonerated the curtains before tossing them into the washing machine, dousing them with bleach, closing the lid and feeling accomplished.

At the end of the cycle, I went to check their progress and good news! The curtains were thoroughly de-dingy-fied! They were white and pretty again. They were also shredded.

At first I thought of hiding the evidence and saying, “This too shall pass.” Throwing out the shredded fabric and pretending I just wanted to buy new curtains, but then I thought, “No, this too shall post.” I refuse to present a picture of myself (in person or in social media) that communicates that I have it all together, that I never struggle, that my life is grand all the time.

I am also incompetent. This too shall post. 

Upon investigation the curtains said, in large bold letters, “Hand wash only, DO NOT BLEACH.” Apparently those are more rules than suggestions.

This too shall post.

I don’t have it all together. I am not always happy. I do not read labels. I can be humbled by a little beach and decade old curtains.

And that’s okay. Today I choose to share my incompetence rather than hide it.

How about you? Whats your humbling story? This too shall post!