Archive from June, 2017
Jun 23, 2017 - Doctorate, Humor    1 Comment

Adding Playtime

Life is busy.

That may be the biggest understatement of the year for you, just as it is for me.

My friend recently told that I was effectively leading three lives, which she labeled as: full-time student, full-time therapist, and everything else (church, friends, sleep, downtime).

I have tried very purposefully to balance and keep the three lives moving in unison. But without constant vigilance, the first two lives balloon out and eclipse the third. I will not allow my school projects to usurp self-care time. I will work fervently when I am at work, and I will rest fiercely when I am away.

I’ve started adding time that I call Doctoral Student Playtime. I need it. My days are directed by infants’ schedules and productivity demands. My evenings are swallowed in research articles and APA citations. There has to be a third space to keep me sane.

I’ve fit lots of options into this third space: Disney, dinner with a friend, sitting outside and watching the birds at my bird feeder (Yes, I am an old lady). I’ve added another category: Play. Do the unexpected. Be ridiculous. Laugh at yourself.

I read a book recently, aptly called Play, which argued for the importance of play in childhood. As a therapist, I know this. Play is a child’s primary occupation. It is the principle method utilized to learn about oneself and the world. But the book argued that playtime was also crucial for adults. We need a balance in life. We will quickly run out of steam if work, productivity, achievement, accomplishment, and efficiency is our driving force.

Levity matters. Playfulness strengthens. Laughter heals.

It doesn’t take long. The more ridiculous, the better in my opinion. Five minutes of laughter can fill my tank after five hours of paper writing. So I’m committed to making time to play. I invite you to join me!

Jun 17, 2017 - My Story    No Comments

Defeated by my Dryer

My appliances are ganging up on me. They must plot at night to see the best way to derail my carefully laid plans. There’s no other explanation for it.

ACT I – Characters and Conflict Introduced 

Two weeks ago, my year-old dryer unexpectedly quit working. After three hours of trying to dry one load of laundry, I gave up and hung my scrubs from every available surface in my house. The machine turned on, the motor worked, but there was zero heat. Which I learned was a necessity for a dryer’s function, after I tried, unsuccessfully, to dry a load of laundry for three hours. When I calculated the amount of laundry done in my house and the amount of time needed to air dry and the surface area from which to hang clothes, I knew we needed a quick fix.

One Google search, two YouTube videos, and one Amazon Prime order later… I decided to fix it myself.

I am a MacGyver at heart. I believe duct tape can cure many of the worlds ills. But I have never attempted a repair of this scale. But the video was only six minutes long, so I figured I could handle it.

I took apart the shell, door, moisture sensing and door wires, heating housing, and replaced the heating element. I watched the YouTube video ten seconds at a time and performed the necessary steps. What took YouTube six minutes, took me two hours to perform. 

I had a good attitude throughout it all. I even stopped to take pictures, thinking to myself, “This is going to be a blog post!” I began narrating my post in my head as my roommate cheered me on (Yes, I narrate my own life). I would be played by Rosie the Riveter, a fierce, resourceful, and independent woman who could handle anything. I whistled to myself as I put my dryer back together, confident that I was awesome.

ACT II – The Struggle

Last Saturday morning, I embarked on a quest to fix my dryer. I was covered in sweat and dryer lint. There was blood. There were tears. And my dryer emerged victorious!

I was crushed. This was not the narrative I was writing. Perhaps, I was not Rosie the Riveter after all. I felt small, alone, and like I had wasted my day. I got a shower and cried. (On a side note, after this debacle, I had two term papers to write for school. It was a rough day.)

I had a choice. I could either give up and call an actual repairman, or I could try again. Having a stubborn streak in me, I chose the latter.

Commence more Google searches. More YouTube videos. More parts overnighted from Amazon.

ACT III – The Resolution

Sunday, I did it all again. My friend held a flashlight while I unscrewed, jimmied, grunted, and problem solved to replace the fuse and the thermostat. I put the pieces back together more tentatively this time. I was at the end of my fuse (pun intended). If this didn’t work, I had no other options. I had exhausted my knowledge and skills.

But my dryer heated!

I danced a jig. I fist pumped. I got so excited that I accidentally high-fived my roommate in the face.

FIN

So, what was the purpose of this three act play? Why did I have to go through the lows of Saturday before experiencing the highs of Sunday? Because my strength is tested and formed in times of struggle and disappointment. Because the fully functioning dryer was sweeter to me after sitting in the mess of the brokenness. Because life isn’t linear. Instead, our growth is parabolic, full of ups and downs, highs and lows, and all demanding perseverance.

I experienced a bit of sanctification last weekend as I battled my dryer. The narrative in my head wasn’t always accurate the first time, but it was good in the end. I have other narratives that I’ve been writing for quite some time that aren’t ending up as I had planned. I’ve narrated how I would meet my soul mate. I’ve narrated my perfect job. I’ve narrated my publishing career. I’ve narrated and re-narrated my five-year plan a dozen times. But God is writing a different story in my life. And His story is sure to contain many Act II moments, but it is sure to be good in the end.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

PS – If you want to battle your own dryer, here’s the video!

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